The Quaffle Mystery
by TDWidow
Summary: Two of the Force. A flirty Princess. A Quidditch team made up of elephants and hobbits. It's all here as characters from every story imaginable infiltrate the world of Disney's Beauty and the Beast. And they've brought their villains too. *COMPLETE*
1. The March of the Angry Mob

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~AUTHOR'S NOTE~ Welcome to my newest fic! This idea came to me as I was listening to "The Mob Song" from _Beauty and the Beast_ one night. It is my second crossover, but much more large scale than my first! Before every chapter, I will list characters and their descriptions for any new characters in the story. I hope you all enjoy!

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~MAJOR DISCLAIMER~ Wow…so many stories in here. And I don't own one! I don't own anything Disney, don't own LotR, don't own Psycho, don't own Buffy…get my point? I own nothing but the insane concoctions of my brain!

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CHARACTERS

Aragorn Aragorn is the heroic hidden heir to a King in _Lord of the Rings_. He is a member of the Fellowship of the Ring and a deadly swordsman.

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Legolas Greenleaf Legolas is another member of the Fellowship of the Ring in _Lord of the Rings_. He is the Prince of the Wood Elves of Mirkwood and has lethal accuracy with the bow and arrow.

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LeFouShort and stupid, LeFou is Gaston's puppet in _Beauty and the Beast_. Therefore, when Gaston asks him to help attack the Beast's castle, LeFou doesn't refuse.

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Gaston Gaston is jilted by Belle – the woman he thinks he loves but really only loves her beauty – when she refuses to marry him in _Beauty and the Beast_. He is setting out to attack the Beast, whom Belle loves.

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Belle The most beautiful girl in the village – and also the most spirited. Belle despises the man who wants to marry her. Instead, she finds love in the Beast in _Beauty and the Beast_.

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Maurice In _Beauty and the Beast_, Maurice is Belle's father. He loves her completely, but is a bit strange in his own ways.

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William the Bloody "Spike" _Buffy the Vampire Slayer_'s Spike was once one of the baddest vampires in the world. At least, he'd like to think so. But when an implanted chip in his brain stops him from his vampiric activity, he must learn to be a good guy?

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NormanThe quiet motel owner in _Psycho_ seems like the nice, normal type. And he is – it's his mother you need to worry about…

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OTHER THINGS TO KEEP IN MIND ABOUT THE CHARACTERS WHILE READING THE STORY

William the Blood "Spike" Spike's character speaks in a British accent.

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Norman Norman has two voices: a normal man's voice and the "creepy old woman voice," which sounds like a crotchety old woman with a deep alto voice.

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ALL FALLING FROM THE STARS LIKE RAIN Chapter 1

*an angry mob forms at night in a small village*

*they continue to sing a rallying song*

Angry Mob: *singing* It's a beast, why as tall as a mountain.

We won't rest till he's good and deceased!

Sally forth, tally ho –

Grab your sword!

Grab your bow!

Aragorn: I have a sword!

Legolas: And I have a bow!

*two smile at the mob*

LeFou: Who are you? You're interrupting our march against the enemy!

Legolas: Enemy?

Aragorn: *excited* Like, Sauron?

*confused looks*

Gaston: We're marching against THE BEAST! You must help us!

Aragorn: And why must we help?

Gaston: The beast is evil. You must help us kill it, or we'll use our influence in this town to imprison you!

*Aragorn and Legolas start laughing*

Gaston: What's so funny?

Aragorn: *still giggling* You! You have no influence over us. Legolas is an Elf Prince and I'm heir to the throne of Gondor!

*silence*

Gaston: Uh…are you on drugs?

Legolas: How dare you insult my Royal Bloodline! At least, I think that was an insult…

*Legolas reaches for an arrow but Aragorn stops him*

*Gaston doesn't notice*

Gaston: So come help us kill the beast!

Aragorn and Legolas: Ok.

*****

*inside a basement of some kind*

Belle: We have to warn the Beast! Oh Papa, this is all my fault! What are you going to do?

Maurice: Now, now, we'll think of something!

*a figure emerges from the shadows*

Spike: How 'bout we just break down the door?

*Belle gasps*

Maurice: *frightened* Who are you? What do you want?

Spike: Come on now, if I wanted to scare you, I could. But I don't. I just want to get out of here!

Belle:W-well, they bolted the door from the outside.

Spike: Not a problem!

*Spike breaks through the door and turns back towards the two in full vampire face*

Spike: There!

*Belle screams and faints*

*Spike feels his forehead*

Spike: Oh, whoops, didn't mean to scare her.

*turns back to human face*

Spike: How's that?

*Maurice screams and faints*

Spike: Bloody hell!

*****

*Aragorn and Legolas have insisted on leading the mob*

Gaston: I thought I was leader here!

Legolas: Are _you_ a Prince? No. I thought not.

*Gaston sulks*

Angry Mobster #1: We should stop and rest!

*Aragorn turns and reads the man's nametag*

Aragorn: And _why_ should we do that, Norman?

Norman: Because Mother's tired! *creepy old woman voice* Yes! I need rest! *normal voice* See?

*Aragorn and Legolas exchange looks*

Legolas: Ok. We'll all take five.


	2. The Last Quidditch Player

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~DISCLAIMER~ I don't own any of this. It's really too bad, but other people are just smarter than me to come up with it sooner! Enjoy my strange concoction of plots that aren't mine!

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NEW CHARACTERS

Oliver Wood Oliver is a member of the Gryffindor House of Hogwarts in _Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone_. He's also Keeper and Captain of the House Quidditch team. And played by the DELICIOUS Sean Biggerstaff!

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Harry Potter Harry is a renowned wizard and he's only in his first year at Hogwarts! In _Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone_, he proves his worth both as a wizard AND as the Seeker for Gryffindor's Quiddtich team.

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Agent Zed Zed is in control of the Men in Black, the elite organization to fight alien crime in _Men in Black 1 and 2_. The MIB have no real identity and no one knows they exist.

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Coach Kreeton Coach Kreeton is the miserable and extremely bitter coach of Dullmont Junior High School. A character on _All That_, he is one of the principle characters played by the comedic genius Kel Mitchell.

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Dumbo In Disney's animated _Dumbo_, Dumbo is a young elephant with the ability to fly using his oversized ears as wings. He cannot speak but communicates through his mouse friend, or, in my story, through writing things with his trunk.

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Jar Jar Binks Jar Jar is the comic relief in _Star Wars Episodes 1 and 2_. He is a native of the planet Naboo and later becomes the diplomatic representative of Naboo in the Old Republic's Senate.

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Lester Burnham The themes of _American Beauty_ include drug abuse, adultery, lust, and dysfunction. And Lester is in the middle of all of it. He senses his wife growing away from him (and towards a Real Estate tycoon) and his life slipping away.

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Peregrin "Pippin" Took One of the four hobbits in the Fellowship of the Ring, Pippin is the innocent and a bit naïve one of them all. From a place called the Shire and the movie _Lord of the Rings_, Pippin is close friends with his cousin, Meriadoc Brandybuck.

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Meriadoc "Merry" Brandybuck Also from _Lord of the Rings_ and the Shire, Merry comes up with the plans that get Pippin into trouble. The two are hardly ever seperated and Merry accompanied Pippin and his cousin Frodo in the Fellowship of the Ring.

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Superdude The teenage superhero of the world of _All That_, Superdude has super powers that set him apart from…well, normal people at least. Superdude is a character made famous by _All That_'s Kenan Thompson.

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Stitch Originally, experiment 626 was to be exiled to a desert planet. But the little blue alien escaped in _Lilo and Stitch_ and fled to Earth. There, a little Hawaiian girl adopted him and named him Stitch. But he hasn't lost _all_ evil tendencies…

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Mini Me Dr. Evil, a sinister, uh, mastermind in _Austin Powers The Spy Who Shagged Me_ created Mini Me as his clone. Dr. Evil favors the clone over his own son, Scott, for Mini Me is more evil.

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OTHER THINGS TO KEEP IN MIND

Oliver Wood Oliver also speaks in an accent – Sean Biggerstaff's real Scottish accent. (**Author's Note** And his accent is GORGEOUS!!)

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Harry Potter Harry has a British accent.

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Coach Kreeton If you've never seen the show, Kreeton has a gravely raspy voice and screams "DIE" often. At least, I think it's die. It could just be "DAH." He is old, bald, and missing a tooth.

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Jar Jar Binks Jar Jar has a Jamaican accent and a high and annoying voice.

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Peregrin "Pippin" Took Pippin speaks in a slight Scottish accent – actor Billy Boyd hides most of his strong Scottish brogue.

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Stitch Very hard to describe. If you've seen the movie or previews, you'll understand. If not, imagine Stitch's voice however you think a space alien should sound!

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Mini Me Mini Me has a very high pitched voice and never speaks. At least, not real words. He shreiks a lot though.

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ALL FALLING FROM THE STARS LIKE RAIN Chapter 2

*At the Beast's castle, unaware of the impending attack*

*On a large field by the castle under sports lights*

Oliver: Ok, here's the deal.

*he faces a line of 10 people/creatures*

Oliver: As Hogwarts seems to have disappeared and my Quidditch team with it, I must build a new team. You ten have all expressed interest in playing for my team. As I am still keeper and Harry – 

*Harry waves to the line*

Oliver: – is still seeker, we need three chasers and two beaters. That's five positions. So half of you will make it.

*all ten look apprehensive or lost*

Oliver: Starting at the right end of the line, state your name and something you think will help you to play Quidditch. Ok, go ahead.

Agent Zed: Hello. I have no name and no identity, but people call me Agent Zed. I run a top-secret organization that monitors and controls Alien activities on Earth.

*puts on sunglasses*

Zed: We are the Men in Black!

Harry: Uh…all right then. Next!

Coach Kreeton: Die! I'm Coach Kreeton!

Oliver: Ok…can you tell us anything about yourself.

Coach Kreeton: I coach the little DEVIL SPAWN at Dullmont Jr. High School and I live a sad, MISERABLE LIFE!

*silence*

Coach Kreeton: DIIIE!!

*runs off the field and accidentally over a cliff*

Coach Kreeton: Ahhh!

*Harry, Oliver, and the other potential players grimace*

Oliver: Uh…ok. Well, I guess that rules him out. Next?

*Dumbo can't talk, only writes with his trunk in the dirt*

Dumbo:_ I'm Dumbo. I can fly on my own because I was born with such huge ears._

Harry: Wow!

Oliver: That's very good to know, thank you.

*Dumbo nods*

Jar Jar: Meesa Jar Jar Binks!

*Harry glances skeptically at Oliver*

Oliver: Hello Jar Jar. Where are you from?

Jar Jar: Meesa from the planet Naboo! Weesa Gungans live underwater in big cities.

Oliver: That's, uh, great.

Jar Jar: Yessa, Naboo es a very pretty planet, with birds and trees and –

Harry: Uh, thanks Jar Jar. Next!

Lester: Hello. I am Lester Burnham. I think I may be lost.

Oliver: Lost? You're at a Quidditch tryout.

Lester: Oh. Well, as long as that Prince of Real Estate dork isn't here screwing my wife, I should be fine.

*Oliver and Harry share a look*

Oliver: All right! Thanks Lester!

Lester: No problem. It was my pleasure.

Pippin: I'm next!

Oliver: *laughs* All right. What's your name?

Pippin: Peregrin Took. But on one calls me that.

Harry: Well then, what do they call you?

Pippin: Just Pippin. I'm from the Shire! My da's the Train of Tuckborough and I helped Merry's cousin destroy evil!

Merry: That's right! We both did. Although, we haven't really been with Frodo since Amon Hen where we were captured and he left the Fellowship to go to Mordor alone, but we helped him get there! We were with him all the way from –

*Oliver holds up a hand*

Oliver: So you must be Merry?

Merry: Yep! Meriadoc Brandybuck to be precise. My da's the Master of Buckland. I've never played a Big People's sport, but I'm sure I could learn.

Harry: Big People?

Pippin: Oh, that's just Hobbit slang for Humans, Elves, and Maia – the taller races.

Harry: *quietly* Riight…

Oliver: *glares at Harry* Thank you, you two. Who's next?

Superdude: I'm next. I'm…Superdude! The teenage superhero with the powers to try out for a Quidditch team. I can balance on broomsticks high in the air, I can be hit by small leather balls moving by themselves, and I can work well with others! *soft tender music plays* I also enjoy climbing trees and petting puppies and singing nursery rhymes!

*from over the cliff*

Coach Kreeton: Die Superdude, DIE!

Oliver: Uh, very good, Superdude. Next.

Stitch: STITCH!

Harry: Stitch? Is that your name?

*Stitch nods*

Stitch: Stitch is evil space alien! Stitch has six legs!

Zed: *into collar* Unauthorized space alien here, need a response team immediately!

Stitch: No! Stitch doesn't want to leave! Stitch wants to play Quidditch!

*Oliver steps between Zed and Stitch*

Oliver: Enough! Unauthorized or no, Stitch stays here to try out!

Zed: *begrudgingly* Fine. But this is a major breach of protocol!

*Agent Zed glares as Oliver moves on*

Oliver: And who's next?

Mini Me: Eeeeee!

*Stitch growls at Mini Me, who growls back*

Harry: *frustrated* ENOUGH!

Mini Me: *written in the dirt like Dumbo* _Mini Me. Clone. Evil._

Oliver: All right then! Uh, Harry and I are just going to talk. Why don't you nine practice handling the Quaffle a little and avoiding the Bludgers, ok?

*nine wander to where three Quidditch balls rest*

*two Bludgers shoot into the air*

*Oliver and Harry are left alone*

Harry: They scare me. Not at all like the old Gryffindor players. What happened to us?

Oliver: I don't know. But I think _we_ disappeared as opposed to Hogwarts.

Harry: Yes, definitely. So it's only a matter of time before Dumbledore finds a way to bring us back, right?

Oliver: I suppose. But now we need to choose new Quidditch players.

*Oliver glances at the players*

*Mini Me tries to bite through the Quaffle*

*Stitch bites through a bludger and it sinks to the ground*

Oliver: *with raised eyebrows* I think that the little blue thing will make a fair beater!

Harry: Should I add him to the roster?

*Oliver nods, still watching the team*

*Harry makes a note on a clipboard*

Oliver: *sighs* Only four more positions to fill.


	3. MARVELous Guests

**~AUTHOR'S NOTE~** I'm **so** sorry I haven't updated in so long. I've been incredibly busy with moving into my dorm room, now that I'm here at college, so sorry! I can't guarantee how often I'll update things but I'll try my best!

**~DISCLAIMER~** I **still** don't own anything in this story, except this **insane** canon concoction I have created =)

**NEW CHARACTERS**

**Johnny Storm Code named The Human Torch, Johnny Storm is an important member of _The Fantastic Four superhero fighting team. When he three fellow travelers were bombarded with cosmic energy, they were all given fantastic powers. Johnny's power includes flight and the ability to set his body painlessly on fire at will._**

**Scott Summers In the world of _X-Men, there are humans and "mutants" – humans with super abilities. Scott has the uncontrolable power to shoot energy beams from his eyes. Code named Cyclops, he wears a special visor to control this power and harnesses it for the X-Men superhero team._**

**ALL FALLING FROM THE STARS LIKE RAIN Chapter 3**

Spike: Come on, keep up!

Belle: *panting* I need to rest!

Spike: But you want to reach that mob before they reach you precious beast, right?

*Belle nods*

Spike: Then we have to keep going.

Belle: *to herself* I'm glad Papa stayed home.

*Spike stops dead*

Spike: Someone's coming!

Belle: How can you tell?

*Spike gives her a look*

Spike: I'm a vampire, remember?

Belle: *nervously* Oh…right.

*Spike and Belle hide in the bushes*

*a blond man dressed in blue and a dark haired man with a red visor over his eyes walk down the path*

Johnny: Scott, I don't think we're anywhere near New York City!

Scott: Johnny, calm down. I'll just radio Professor Xavier and he'll figure it out.

Johnny: All right, do it then!

*Scott pulls out a communicator with an X on it*

*he pushes the button, but nothing happens*

Scott: Uh…maybe it broke when we fell.

*Johnny rolls his eyes*

Johnny: _Now what do we do?_

*Belle snaps a small twig by accident*

*Spike rolls his eyes*

*Scott and Johnny spin around*

Scott: *with a hand at his red visor* Who's there!

Johnny: Come out here!

*Scott and Johnny look at each other*

*Scott nods his head*

Johnny: Flame on!

*Johnny rises off the ground and becomes engulfed in flame*

*Belle stands up and screams*

*Spike stands up to keep Belle from running away*

Johnny: Who are you?

*he comes back to the ground and the fire goes out*

Spike: Not so fast! Who are you?

Johnny: Are you working for Dr. Doom?

Scott: Or Magneto?

Spike: No! We're not working for anybody!

Belle: We're just trying to rescue the Beast!

Scott: Uh…ok. Sure. But who are you?

Belle: I'm Belle.

Spike: And I'm William the Bloody!

*he sees the looks on the other's faces*

Spike: But you can call me Spike.

Scott: Are you human or mutant?

Belle: I'm only human…but the man I love is an 8 foot tall hairy monster!

*Spike gives her the "you're crazy!" look*

Spike: _That's_ who we're going to rescue?!

Belle: *indignantly* Yes!

Scott: What about you…Spike?

Spike: What?

Scott: Are you human or mutant?

Spike: Oh, I'm neither. I'm a vampire!

Johnny: A vampire? Oh come on, they're not real!

*Spike changes into vampire face*

Spike: Oh really.

*Scott and Johnny jump*

Johnny: Uh…*laughs nervously* Ok. Maybe you really are a vampire!

Spike: Of course I am! It's a bloody long story as to how I became one, but I won't bore you with all that.

*he sees the other's looks*

Spike: Oh don't worry. I can't hurt you.

*looks of confusion*

Spike: You see, these commando guys captured me and put a chip in my head, so everytime I try to bite someone or even hit them, it sends a jolt of extreme pain through my head.

Scott: Oh.

Belle: That would have been good to know!

Scott: Well, I'm Scott Summers. I'm part of an elite fighting team of mutants called the X-Men. We protect the human race from those mutants who have chosen evil.

Spike: Oh yeah? Well, what can you do?

*a red energy beam shoots from the vior across Scott's eyes and splinters a nearby tree*

Scott: That. They call me Cyclops.

Spike: I see.

Belle: And what about you, Johnny?

Johnny: *blushing* Well, I'm human but I was mutated by energy rays from out space. So now I can set myself on fire. But it doesn't hurt!

Belle: That's amazing!

*Belle and Johnny smile at each other while Scott and Spike roll their eyes*


	4. Many Meetings of Many Kinds

**~AUTHOR'S NOTE~ Again, I _know_ it's been a long time since I updated, and I'm so sorry! Here's the next chapter, I can't guarantee that the next one will be soon; college is more work than I thought! I also have changed the title of this story from All Falling From the Stars Like Rain to Worlds Falling From the Stars. I like it shorter like that.**

**~DISCLAIMER~ I still don't own anything except this crazy messed-up story I have built.**

NEW CHARACTERS 

**Sweaty Woman Always present when Superdude is, the Sweaty Woman seems to be his biggest supporter and to know more about him than anyone. She never stops sweating, a trait that must be very cumbersome to Sweaty Woman's alter ego – _All That's Lori Beth Denberg._**

**Dorothy The main character of _The Wizard of Oz, Dorothy makes her way through the magical land of Oz to the great Wizard of Oz. The Wizard supposedly will help her find her way home to Kansas. She always travels with her dog, Toto._**

**Scarecrow He is Dorothy's first companion on the way to the Wizard. In the mythical word of _The Wizard of Oz, the Scarecrow doesn't have a brain – yet always seems to know what's going on._**

WORLDS FALLING FROM THE STARS Chapter 4 

*9 players line up in front of Oliver and Harry*

Oliver: You all played very well. As your captain, I have chosen our five new players. With help from our seeker, Harry Potter.

*Harry nods*

Oliver: Harry, would you please read the roster?

Harry: *clears his throat* Keeper: Captain Oliver Wood.

*Oliver acknowledges crowd*

Harry: Seeker: Harry Potter. That's me. Beaters: Dumbo and Stitch.

Stitch: Yay! Stitch a beater!

*Dumbo grins*

Harry: And finally, Chasers: Merry, Pippin, and Superdude.

*woman steps onto the field*

Sweaty Woman: Yay! Let's hear it for Superdude! Hip hip…!

*silence*

Superdude: Well, thanks for trying anyway, Sweaty Woman!

Sweaty Woman: No problem!

*Sweaty Woman steps off the field and disappears*

Merry: *blinks in confusion a few times, then shakes his head* Pip, we made it! We're chasers!

Pippin: All right! For the Shire!

*both hobbits laugh*

Oliver: I'm sorry to all those who were cut, you all played very well.

*before the others have a chance to complain, the angry mob bursts onto the field*

Angry Mob: Kill the Beast! Kill the Beast! Kill the –

Merry: Aragorn?

Pippin: Legolas?

*Aragorn puts a hand up to stop Mob*

Aragorn: Merry! Pippin! What are you doing here?

Pippin: I'm playing Quidditch!

Legolas: Quidditch?

Merry: Yeah, Pippin and I are the new chasers!

Aragorn: Whoa, whoa, wait. What is Quidditch?

*Merry and Pippin look at each other*

Pippin: Uh, Captain Oliver? What's Quidditch?

Oliver: *to Aragorn and Legolas* Quidditch is the most highly respected Wizard sport.

Aragorn: Oh! I get it. So…where are the Wizards?

*Harry and Oliver glance at each other*

Harry: Uh…we're right here.

Oliver: Harry and I are the only real Wizards. But don't worry. We'll teach the others the rules!

Legolas: You two look awfully young for Maia.

Harry: Maia?

Aragorn: That is the race of Wizards.

Oliver: Well, not us. We're human Wizards.

Aragorn: _Human_ Wizards?

Harry: Yeah. *to Oliver* He must be a Muggle!

Stitch: Muggle?

*he seems to like the word*

Stitch: MUGGLE!

Gaston: *sarcastically* Oh fearless leaders, can we attack the castle now?

Oliver: It's useless to attack that castle.

LeFou: Why?

Oliver: Well, no one's in it!

Superdude: Our Quidditch captain is correct! The castle is abandoned.

LeFou: Abandoned? It can't be!

Stitch: Is. Is abandoned.

*LeFou glares at Stitch as Stitch curls up into a perfect ball and rolls around*

Gaston: It's all right, LeFou. The Beast clearly ran to hide from our mob. But we'll find him!

*he raises a torch*

Gaston: Are you all still with me?

*angry mob cheers and follows Gaston and LeFou out*

Norman: *creepy mother voice* I'll get you Gaston! You should have let me rest more…

*Norman follows Gaston with murderous glint in his eye*

*Aragorn and Legolas watch them leave*

Agent Zed: Perhaps we should follow the angry, homicidal mob.

*Mini Me is already following the mob*

Lester: I agree. It might be fun.

Jar Jar: Meesa doin nothin.

*Four follow the angry mob*

Oliver: Well, that's one way to get rid of the cut players!

*Harry nods*

Aragorn: Um, everyone? Can I say something?

*everyone, even Stitch, stops to pay attention*

Aragorn: Does this feel…wrong to anyone else? I mean, we aren't supposed to be here. We can all feel that.

*Spike and Scott run in – Spike in Vampire face and Scott battle ready*

Spike: Where are they? Where's the angry mob?

Pippin: Who're you?

Spike: Bloody hell, we missed the fight, didn't we?

Scott: What do you care, you can't fight anyway!

Spike: *turning back to human face* But I could have watched!

Aragorn: *shouting* HOLD IT!

*everyone turns to look at him*

Aragorn: Thank you! Now. We are all in the wrong place. You must realize that.

Harry: Yeah, but Professor Dumbledore will figure out some way to get Oliver and me back.

Merry: And you and Legolas will get me and Pip back…right?

*Aragorn looks doubtful*

*two more figures emerge onto the field holding hands and looking very lovey-dovey*

Belle: *absently* Did you save the Beast?

Spike: No, he's dead. The mob chopped him up and barbequed him!

*others grimace except Stitch who enjoys the idea*

Belle: *still gazing into Johnny's eyes* That's nice.

Superdude: Well, this is all nice and dandy, but the unshaven man is correct. We are not where we are supposed to be.

Dumbo: _How do you know?_

Superdude: Because I'm Superdude!

Spike: *shrugs* Well, I guess it doesn't do any good to just stand around here, does it?

*Spike starts walking off the field*

Spike: Come on now! We might as well leave since this field won't help us get home! Not that I'm all that anxious to get home.

*others shrug and follow him*

Pippin: Doesn't it feel like we should be singing?

Everyone else: No.

*****

*two people and a dog skip down a path*

People: *singing* Weee're off to see the Wizard! The wonderful…

Dorothy: This doesn't look familiar!

Scarecrow: Of course, I'm not very logical, but it doesn't seem like Oz at all!

*dog barks*

Dorothy: Toto? I have a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore!

*dog looks at her strangely*

Dorothy: Oz! I have a feeling we're not in Oz anymore!

Scarecrow: Why don't we just here?

Dorothy: *looks around* For what?

Scarecrow: I don't know! We should just wait.

*Dorothy shrugs and they sit on a log*


	5. The Back Story of All

**~DISCLAIMER~** Still don't own these characters, but the plot combination is ALL MINE! :)

NEW CHARACTERS 

**Saruman the White In _Lord of the Rings, the Wizards of Middle Earth form a Council – Saruman the White being Wizard in charge. However, as discovered painfully by Gandalf the Gray, Saruman has had a "change of heart" and now follows the Dark Lord Sauron._**

**Orcs The Orcs are an evil race in _Lord of the Rings. Mutated from Elves, Orcs mindlessly serve the evil forces of Middle Earth, such as Saruman the White and the Dark Lord Sauron._**

**Uruk-Hai A new race, Uruk-Hai are the creation of Saruman the White in _Lord of the Rings. Saruman crossed Orcs and Goblin men to create the savage Uruk-Hai warriors, who, in turn, serve only the Wizard himself._**

**Wedge Antilles Wedge is a brave and daring starfighter pilot for the Rebellion in the world of _Star Wars. He fights alongside the bravest and noblest pilots in the galaxy and is good friends with the Jedi Luke Skywalker._**

**Luke Skywalker The last of the Jedi Knights and the son of the galaxy's most feared Sith Lord, Luke Skywalker holds the fate of the universe in _Star Wars_. His powerful control over the Force has made him one of the most powerful Jedi in the universe, giving him seemingly magical powers.**

**Voldemort In the world of _Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone_, Voldemort (or He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named or You-Know-Who) is an extremely powerful dark Wizard. His quest for power led to his defeat the night he killed Lily and James Potter but was unable to kill their young son Harry.**

**Emperor Palpitine Leader of the Galactic Empire, Emperor Palpitine is one of the most deadly Dark Side users in all of the _Star Wars_ universe. With his right hand Darth Vader at his side, he is a very powerful enemy.**

**Darth Vader A Dark Lord of the Sith, Vader uses his Dark Side power for strength rather than magic like his master. The _Star Wars_ universe quivers under his black-gloved touch. His only weakness is his desire to turn his son, Luke Skywalker, to the Dark Side.**

**Wicked Witch of the West Enslaver of the race of winged monkeys, the Wicked Witch rules her own part of the land of _The Wizard of Oz_. However, she needs Dorothy's ruby red slippers to gain her full powers and take over the land completely.**

OTHER THINGS TO KEEP IN MIND 

**Saruman the White Saruman is played by Christopher Lee, who has a very deep and modulated voice. He dresses in white robes to signify his status in the Wizard's Council.**

**Uruk-Hai The Uruk-Hai don't speak as much as growl everything they say.**

Emperor Palpitine The Emperor has a raspy and lizard like voice. His eyes are yellow and his skin seems to be decaying with evil. 

**Darth Vader** Vader is draped in black and breathes through a mask. He is voiced by James Earl Jones.

**Wicked Witch of the West** She is green skinned and has a screechy voice.

WORLDS FALLING FROM THE STARS Chapter 5 

*an old man in white walks towards a large castle*

Saruman: There. That will be my new stronghold.

*a creature beside Saruman growls*

Saruman: Yes. My Uruk-Hai will continue to multiply in the caverns of Isengard, ready for me when I find a way to return to Middle Earth.

*another creature behind Saruman looks confused*

Orc: Then where are we, my lord?  
Saruman: I do not know. But I will make that castle the fortress of –

Uruk-Hai: *shouts* SARUMAN!

*three continue toward the castle*

*****

*two men walk along another forest path – one in a black tunic and one in an orange flight suit*

Wedge: Luke, I don't like this!

Luke: I don't like it either. Something about this place feels…wrong.

*Wedge looks at him strangely*

Wedge: If you say so buddy.

Luke: Look, I can just tell. Trust me.

*Wedge shakes his head*

Wedge: You Jedi!

Luke: *laughing* Yeah, all two of us: me and Master Yoda!

Wedge: Well Jedi, just keep following those senses!

*the two laugh and keep walking*

*****

*Saruman reaches castle*

*Orc and Uruk-Hai open the huge doors for him*

Saruman: Now let me see my new…

*six others already in the great hall turn to look at him*

Voldemort: Another?? Get out! This castle is mine!

*Orc scurries behind Saruman*

Saruman: Who are you?

Voldemort: I am Voldemort, evil Wizard, He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named. I am forced to take over people's bodies until my own strength returns. *shouts* Who are you?

Saruman: I am Saruman the White – head of the Wizard's Council.

Voldemort: *suspiciously* But you are evil. I can feel that.

Saruman: *chuckles* Yes, well, you Voldemort should know that not all Wizards remain good.

Voldemort: *smiles* Yes. What is this Wizard's Council?

Saruman: All the most powerful Wizards of Middle Earth are part of this Council. Myself, Gandalf the Gray, and Radagast the Brown included.

Voldemort: I see.

Saruman: But the Wizard's Council is composed of good Wizards. It will only be a matter of time before I am expelled from the order, now that Gandalf has discovered my…change of heart.

*Voldemort waves a hand*

Voldemort: Orders and Councils are unnecessary for truly powerful Wizards.

Saruman: I agree. Perhaps, Voldemort, we should join in our efforts.

Voldemort: Perhaps.

Emperor Palpatine: *from the crowd* Your alliance is insignificant.

Saruman: A Wizard's alliance, sir, is a powerful bond.

*big black-caped man steps out*

Darth Vader: Nothing is more powerful than the Dark Side!

Emperor: Calm, my friend. Soon we will show them what true power is!

Vader: Yes, my master.

Voldemort: *raised voice* There are seven of us here! Perhaps we should all consider joining.

*green skinned woman steps out*

Wicked Witch of the West: But you see, the problem there becomes this. We are all used to being in complete control of our evil followers. What would happen if we all had to…cooperate?

*silence*

*all seven glare at each other evilly*

*****

*Quidditch team, Aragorn, Legolas, Spike, Scott, Johnny, & Belle walk down a forest path*

Oliver: So if we're all in the wrong place, that means we all come from somewhere else, right?

*nodding heads*

Oliver: So, I want to know about all the other places!

*everyone nods, liking the idea*

Legolas: Well it's your idea, why don't you start?

Oliver: Ok. Harry, wanna help me out?

Harry: All right. First off, we're from England. The world we come from is divided between magic and non-magic. Magic people – 

Oliver: Like Harry and me.

Harry: Right. We're wizards. Girls are called witches. But the non-magic people are called muggles.

Oliver: We go to a school of Witchcraft and Wizardry – Hogwarts. It's the finest in all England! Harry here just finished his first year and I finished my fifth.

Pippin: So you're real Wizards? Show us something.

Harry: All right.

*all stop walking*

*Harry pulls out his wand*

Harry: Wingardium Leviosa!

*Oliver pulls out his wand and helps Harry*

*Pippin starts rising off the ground*

Pippin: Ah! Merry! Strider! Help!

*Oliver and Harry laugh and set Pippin down*

Oliver: Other than that, where we're from is a lot like here.

Harry: Oh, and there's this evil Wizard named Voldemort who's trying to kill me.

*Oliver glares sharply at Harry*

Oliver: You know we do NOT speak his name, Harry!

*Harry looks guilty*

Harry: Sorry…

Belle: What's wrong with saying his name?

Oliver: I don't know, we just don't.

*the group walks again*

Oliver: *to Belle* Why don't you tell us about where you're from?

Belle: Oh. Well, I'm from here!

Harry: Here?

Merry: Oh good, explain here to us!

Belle: Well, this is France. My father is the inventor of the village near the Beast's castle.

Dumbo: _By the Quidditch field?_

Oliver: *correcting* Quidditch Pitch.

Dumbo: _By the Quidditch Pitch?_

Belle: Right. I rescued my father from the Beast and took his place. Then the Beast and I fell in love.

*Johnny drops her hand*

Johnny: Oh really.

Belle: What?

Johnny: You really are in love with that thing!

Belle: But I like you too!

Johnny: I don't need this.

*Johnny walks off ahead of the group*

Belle: Johnny! Johnny, wait!

*Belle runs after him*

Pippin: *watching them leave* Ok…

*Stitch hits Pippin's leg*

Stitch: You!

Pippin: Ow!

Stitch: You, you, you!

Merry: He wants to know where we come from, Pip.

Aragorn: *taking over* They are with us. They're hobbits – a race from the land called the Shire.

Legolas: Yes. We're all from Middle Earth. I am Legolas, Prince of the Wood Elves. But this doesn't seem to be Middle Earth anymore.

Superdude: Uh, excuse me. Elves?

Legolas: Yes. The Elves are the oldest race of Middle Earth.

Superdude: All right then.

Aragorn: I'm human. But there are also other sentient races, like Maia and Dwarves.

*Legolas rolls his eyes*

Aragorn: Elves do not get along well with Dwarves.

Harry: You said Maia were Wizards?

Pippin: Yep! Like Gandalf…but he's not here.

Merry: Good call Pip.

*Pippin looks confused as Aragorn continues*

Aragorn: Evil in Middle Earth is all controlled by Sauron – a dark lord of the Land of Mordor. His power is linked to the One Ring of Power…but we're working on destroying that.

Pippin: Well, Frodo is.

Merry: My cousin!

*Merry grins*

*Pippin notices Scott's visor*

Pippin: Hey! What's wrong with your eyes?

*all eyes turn to Scott*

Scott: I'm a mutant.

*confused looks*

*up ahead, Belle and Johnny are still arguing*

Scott: Where I'm from, there are also two kinds of people: humans and mutants.

Harry: So…you're not human.

Scott: Well, no, I am human, but mutants are born each with a special power of some kind. It comes from a mutation of the cells.

Merry: So what's your power?

*Scott blasts a tree off the path*

Merry: Wow!

Scott: The X-Men – my team – use our powers to protect the humans.

Harry: That's bloody brilliant!

*Oliver glances strangely at Harry*

Harry: Sorry…I had a Ron moment there.

*Oliver nods in understanding*

Scott: My world is boring. Someone else!

Stitch: Me!

*others nod*

Stitch: Stitch is alien experiment. Went to find ohana.

Dumbo: _Ohana?_

Stitch: Ohana means family. Family means nobody gets left behind. Or forgotten.

Dumbo: _Do you have a family?_

Stitch: Yes. I found my family all by myself. Good family. But this not Hawaii. This not home.

Scott: *sadly* This isn't anyone's home.

*he looks around*

Scott: Except Belle's.

Spike: What about Johnny? Where's he from?

Scott: Oh, Johnny's from where I'm from.

Stitch: Human or mutant?

Scott: Well, he's human but he has special powers of his own.

Harry: Like what?

*group stops*

Spike: Johnny!

*Johnny and Belle stop*

*Johnny turns*

Spike: Uh, fire! Or whatever you do.

Johnny: *smiling* Oh. Flame on!

*Johnny becomes engulfed in flame and rises off the ground*

*the group watches, impressed*

Spike: Ok, thanks mate!

*Johnny returns to normal and to the ground*

*he and Belle resume arguing*

Dumbo: _Does everyone have special power here but me?_

Oliver: You said you can fly!

Dumbo:_ Oh yeah_.

*group starts walking again*

Oliver: Dumbo, where are you from?

Dumbo: _A circus_.

*silence*

Harry: Is that all?

*Dumbo nods*

Harry: Oh.

*more silence and more walking*


	6. The Voice of Reason

**~AUTHOR'S NOTE~** This is the last time I'm going to change the title, I PROMISE! Sorry I've been so sporadic with my updating (on ALL stories)…I'm trying to be better!

**~DISCLAIMER~** Don't own anything. Cept all these combinations and relationships between canons!

NEW CHARACTERS 

**Sebastian In _The Little Mermaid_, Sebastian the crab serves as both advisor to the merking King Triton and as baby-sitter to his headstrong daughter Ariel. He travels with Ariel to the world of humans.**

**Dr. Doom A powerful European villain, Dr. Doom opposes the fighting team of _The Fantastic Four_. He wears a mask of metal due to a laboratory accident he suffered in college.**

**Magneto Gifted with the power of control over all things metal, Erik Magnus, code named Magneto, is the arch enemy of Professor Charles Xavier. Therefore, he also is the enemy of Xavier's fighting team, the _X-Men_.**

**Iago Servant to the sorcerer Jafar, Iago is a small red parrot. In Agrahbah, the world of _Aladdin_, he is usually the only one to see the obvious in any problem.**

****

**OTHER THINGS TO KEEP IN MIND**

**Sebastian** Sebastian has a Jamaican accent.

**Dr. Doom** Speaks through a breath mask with an Eastern European accent.

**Iago** Iago is voiced by Gilbert Gottfried – a man with a VERY distinct voice.

**THE QUAFFLE MYSTERY Chapter 6**

*Wedge and Luke trudge on*

Luke: Wedge, stop a minute!

*both stop*

*Luke closes his eyes, concentrating*

Luke: This is strange!

Wedge: What?

Luke: *eyes still closed* I can sense someone up ahead!

Wedge: And that's strange because…?

Luke: *opening his eyes* There are three lifeforms. Two are sentient but one's not all the way…alive.

Wedge: Huh?

Luke: I can't explain it. They don't seem hostile, but have your blaster out just in case.

*Wedge nodes and pulls out a gun*

*two walk up to two figures sitting on a log*

*Dorothy gasps at the sight of Wedge's blaster*

Dorothy: Oh no!

Scarecrow: Who are you? What do you want?

Luke: It's okay, Wedge. I don't think they're gonna hurt us.

Wedge: Okay.

*he puts away his blaster*

Dorothy: Wedge? That's your name?

Wedge: Yeah – Wedge Antilles.

Luke: And I'm Luke Skywalker.

*Dorothy and Scarecrow stand up*

Dorothy: Well, I'm Dorothy Gale –

*she curtsies*

Dorothy: – from Kansas.

Luke: *nodding to her* Nice to meet you.

*he turns to Scarecrow*

Scarecrow: I'm…just Scarecrow.

*Luke looks at him strangely*

Luke: You're not…all the way human, are you?

Scarecrow: *laughs* No. I'm alive, but not human. I haven't got a brain.

Wedge: *surprised* I'm sorry to hear that!

*Scarecrow shrugs*

Dorothy: We're going to see the Wizard of Oz to get him a brain and to get me home to Kansas.

Scarecrow: At least, we were. But this place doesn't look like Oz _or_ Kansas!

Luke: Wedge and I aren't from here either.

*he looks around*

Luke: I sensed a third life form. Where is it?

Dorothy: Third life form? *confused* Oh! Toto! Toto's my dog.

*she looks around*

Dorothy: Where'd he go? Toto? Toto!

*they hear a yelp from the bushes*

*Toto runs out with a crab hanging from his nose*

Dorothy: Oh Toto! Toto, come here!

*crab falls off Toto's nose and hits the ground*

Sebastian: Ow! Jeez…you'd think the shell'd be god for something!

*Wedge, Dorothy, and Scarecrow stare at Sebastian*

*Luke gazed at Sebastian, probing his mind*

Sebastian: What? You've never seen a talking crab before?

Wedge: Uh…no. I've seen a lot of things, but never a talking mollusk!

Sebastian: Well now you have.

Scarecrow: Wow! If I had a brain, I'd remember this forever!

Sebastian: Gah! The Scarecrow's talking! They're not supposed to talk!

Luke: Then this has been educational all around, hasn't it?

Scarecrow: I guess so! What do we do now?

*all look at each other*

Luke: I have a feeling we should just stay here.

Dorothy: You have a feeling? What does –

Wedge: Just trust him.

*Dorothy shrugs*

*all sit on the log*

*****

*all 7 bad guys are still staring evilly at each other*

Dr. Doom: This staring is getting us nowhere!

Magneto: Well then what do _you_ suggest we do?

*Doom glances at evil assembly around the room*

Doom: Perhaps something of a contest. To determine who truly holds the most power.

Wicked Witch: Seems like a waste of time.

Vader: Yes. **Nothing** can defeat the power of the Dark Side!

Voldemort: And you all underestimate the power of magic.

Saruman: Especially the power of the Istari!

*another round of evil glares*

Voice from Above: All right! That's it!

*red bird flies down from the rafters and lands on the back of the throne*

*Voldemort, having been in the throne the whole time, jumps up*

Voldemort: What is this new devilry?

Saruman: Why does that line sound so familiar?

Iago: I'm the voice of REASON!

*Iago slams against the wall and is held there by blue lightning*

Emperor: Do not try my patience, feathered pest!

Iago: *strangled voice* Ok! I'm sorry!

*Emperor ceases the lightning*

Iago: Wow! You evil types really don't like guests!

Voldemort: YOUR NAME!

Iago: IAGO! I once worked for a really evil guy named Jafar, but he's locked away in a lamp now.

Saruman: I hope there is a point to your ramblings, bird. We grow tired of your voice.

Iago: I saw Jafar's mistakes! I could tell you what's good to do and what's stupid!

Doom: I believe we all know very well how to be evil.

Iago: Of course, but I could watch out for mistakes!

*other faces remain stony*

Iago: Please guys! Look, I'm not supposed to be here either! I know how strange this world is! I'd be helpful!

*Vader glances suspiciously at his master*

Vader: How do you know we're all not supposed to be here?

Iago: *looking around* Don't you guys watch TV?

*confused looks*

Iago: TV? The little black box? Movies? Hello?

Saruman: *to Voldemort* The bird may be smarter than we realize.

Voldemort: *nodding* So, Iago, what can you tell us about this…TV?

*Iago starts to say something*

*door bursts open and Coach Kreeton stands in the doorway*

Coach Kreeton: Ahh! More people to torture Coach Kreeton! All I wanna do is find a TV SET so Coach Kreeton can watch Bewitched! *imitating Bewitched sound* Dah-le-le – Dah-le-le!

*Coach Kreeton collapses to the floor, probably from injuries sustained in the cliff fall*

*Dr. Doom and Magneto have been having a secret conference in the corner*

Magneto: Why do they speak of TV as some evil force?

Doom: I do not know Erik. But this is much different than where we're from.

Magneto: Yes Doctor. But where are we?

Doom: I do know know.

*silence*

Doom: *almost embarrassed* Do any of them look…familiar to you?

Magneto: *studying the group* Yes Doctor. They do.

*both look truly scared*


	7. Latest Additions

**~AUTHOR'S NOTE~** Again, really sorry it took me long to update! I'm not making a CONSCIOUS effort to post more often. I promise!

**~DISCLAIMER~** Don't own these characters. Have never owned these characters. WILL never own these characters.

**NEW CHARACTERS**

**Jason **In the _Mighty Morphin Power Rangers_, Jason or the Red Ranger is the leader of the Power Rangers. He has a black belt in the martial arts and takes the role of leader naturally.

**Michelangelo** The youngest of his brothers (I think), Michelangelo is the one with the orange mask in the _Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles_. He is an incurable joker.

**Rita Repulsa** Released after years of imprisonment, Rita launches attacks against the _Mighty Morphin Power Rangers_ from her base on the moon. She creates monsters out of clay and sends them to wreck havoc on Earth.

**Shredder** An ancient martial arts master, the Shredder makes a formidable enemy for the _Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles_. His leadership over the Foot Clan has bolstered his ego and strengthened his war against the Turtles and their master Splinter.

**THE QUAFFLE MYSTERY Chapter 7**

*the Quidditch team and company are STILL on the path*

*it is beginning to get lighter*

Pippin: *looking around* Hey, it's getting lighter!

Merry: Must be morning!

*Aragorn looks tired of the two hobbits*

Aragorn: Good call you two.

*Pippin looks at Merry in confusion, who just waves it off*

Spike: *to Aragorn who has taken the lead* Hey, uh, what's your name – 

Aragorn: Aragorn, son of Arathorn.

Spike: Right. Aragorn, how long do you think we'll be walking?

*Aragorn shrugs*

Spike: All right then. Hey, do you have an easier name than "Aragorn, son of Arathorn?" Gets a bit hard to say.

*Aragorn grumbles under his breath – the journey already seems to be wearing on him*

Pippin: He's called Strider too.

Spike: Strider. Well, that's easier.

*Harry looks at them – he seems tired also*

Harry: You know what? I think I agree with Spike. We've been walking all night.

*Dumbo nods, his trunk dragging on the ground*

Legolas: Look!

*he points up ahead*

*the others squint in the early light, but see nothing*

Scott: What?

Stitch: See nothing.

Aragorn: *to everyone but Legolas* Elves have exceptionally good eyesight. Better than any of us.

Legolas: There is a log up ahead. We can rest there.

*the others nod and speed up at the thought of resting*

*they reach the log and sit down to rest gratefully*

*Legolas stand on guard with his bow, watching the bushes*

Legolas: *tensely* Something moves in the bushes!

*he pulls an arrow from his quiver*

*Aragorn unsheathes his sword*

*Stitch and Superdude prepare for battle also*

Sebastian: *as he pops out of the bushes* Ah! Why me? Why torture the crab?

*members of the group appear in various stages of shock*

Legolas: Such a strange creature!

Spike: It's a crab. But, uh, crabs don't usually talk!

*Dumbo looks at Sebastian suspiciously*

Dumbo: _Sebastian?_

Belle: Hey, I know you!

Sebastian: Yeah! How long has it been?

Belle: It's been a while. Maybe two years?

Johnny: Whoa, whoa, whoa. What is going on?

Belle: Oh, this is Sebastian. I met him at our family reunion.

Superdude: But it cannot be that you are related to a crab. It would be illogical.

Sebastian: Oh no, we're not _really_ related. We met at a Disney family reunion.

Aragorn: Disney?

Merry: What's Disney?

*Luke emerges from the bushes with Wedge, Dorothy, and the Scarecrow*

Luke: I think the real question –

*all others gasp*

Luke: – is what are any of us doing here?

Harry: That's what we've been trying to do. And who are you?

Luke: I am Jedi Knight Luke Skywalker. This is Wedge Antilles, Dorothy Gale of Kansas and the Scarecrow.

*each nod as Luke introduces them*

Oliver: What's a Jedi Knight?

Luke: I have been trained in the art of the Jedi. We harness the power of the Force for good.

Harry: Is the Force a form of magic?

Luke: I guess you could say that.

Aragorn: Wait, wait!

*everyone again stops what they're doing to look at Aragorn*

Aragorn: So, let me get this straight. Legolas, Merry, Pippin, and I are from Middle Earth. Belle, Dumbo, and Sebastian all know each other. Stitch is from Hawaii…

Belle: Oh, we know Stitch too, but he's a new member of the family.

*she glares at Stitch*

*Stitch just grins and lets his tongue hang out*

Aragorn: All right, fine. Scott and Johnny are from New York City, Harry and Oliver are from Hogwarts, Superdude's from everywhere, and Spike's from anywhere.

Spike: Sounds about right.

Aragorn: So…where are all the new people from??

Dorothy: I'm from Kansas originally. But the Scarecrow and I are both here from Oz.

Belle: *doubtfully* Oz.

Wedge: And I'm a starfighter pilot with Luke.

Merry: Starfighters?

Luke: We fly against enemy planets and starships.

Aragorn: So Dorothy and the talking Scarecrow are from Oz and Luke and Wedge are from outer space?

*all nod*

Aragorn: All right, that's it! No more people from ANY world!

*a handsome man in a red shirt approaches from one direction*

Jason: Uh…where am I?

*a large green creature with an orange mask comes from the other direction*

Michelangelo: Hey, what's up dudes?

*silence*

Spike: Bloody hell!

*****

*villains all eagerly await Coach Kreeton's revival*

Darth Vader: Master, we are wasting our time.

Emperor Palpitine: Silence, my friend. We will let these simple minded fools come up with their own explanation for this world.

Vader: And will they ever know the truth?

Emperor: *cackling* Not until we are back on Coruscant.

*the doors slam open to reveal another villain in the doorway*

Saruman: Who is the intruder?

Wicked Witch: And see her outlandish style of dress!

Rita Repulsa: So, this is to be my new lair!

*all other villains really glare at her*

Saruman: There are already seven of us –

Iago: Uh, hello?

Saruman: *rolling his eyes* Already eight of us sharing this stronghold. I doubt we could fit another.

*Rita looks at the other villains*

Rita: If I still had my moonbase, I'd destroy all of you!

*confused looks*

Voldemort: She is a strange one.

Saruman: Yes, but I can feel that she is evil. She will stay!

Rita: Good! Now explain to me what is going on! Because I think that I'm incredibly lost. This doesn't _look_ like the moon!

Voldemort: *sighs* We are all lost. The only one who seems to know what is going on is the unconscious one.

*he gestures to Coach Kreeton still lying in the doorway*

Rita: *sarcastically* Perfect.

*suddenly all are silent*

*deep echoing footsteps come from the entrance*

Darth Vader: It is another one, Master.

Saruman: No more intruders!

*a man donning severe metal attire enters*

Shredder: *looks around* Who are you all?

Iago: *rolls his eyes* Oh great! More evil villains to fight over their non-existent power!

Shredder: The bird speaks unwisely.

Iago: Oh don't start! I've been threatened, roughed up, and yelled at by everyone here. You don't scare me any more than the others.

*Shredder glares at Iago*

Shredder: You will learn your place. Soon, you will all cower in the face of the Foot Clan!

*all bad guys roll their eyes*

Magneto: Right. Because we've never heard _that_ before.


	8. We Lost One

**~AUTHOR'S NOTE~** I've been SO BAD about updating and I'm REALLY sorry! *sad face* Please forgive me? This story is completely written now, it's just a matter of posting it all. BTW, I have a _slight_ crush on Josh Server from _All That_, so of course I had to put one of his characters in here ;)

**~DISCLAIMER~** Don't own anyone or anything. Cept, ya know, this crazy story!

NEW CHARACTER 

**Fizz **Typical teenager working at a fast food restaurant, Fizz is the "straight man" of GoodBurger in _All That_. Actor Josh Server makes Fizz both dorky and cool in the "home of the Goodburger!"

THE QUAFFLE MYSTERY Chapter 8 

*still on the path*

Michelangelo: Dudes, I know I'm the new guy here, but we really need to stop for pizza!

*Merry and Pippin look at each other*

Pippin: What's pizza? *eagerly* Is it food?

Merry: I don't know. Legolas, is pizza food?

*Legolas shrugs*

Superdude: Yes, my hobbit friends. Pizza is indeed a form of sustenance.

Pippin: Sustenance?

Superdude: Food.

Pippin: Oh…

Aragorn: And no, we're NOT stopping for food!

*the others sigh*

Scarecrow: Maybe we'll find food somewhere.

Luke: Perhaps.

*a teenager in a fast food uniform emerges onto the path*

Fizz: Did someone order a burger?

*confused looks*

Fizz: *looking upset* See, I _knew_ I couldn't do this right!

Merry: Do what right?

Fizz: *sighing* I was _supposed_ to make this delivery.

*he holds up a bag*

Fizz: But as soon as I left GoodBurger, I got lost on this path and I can't find where I'm supposed to deliver it to!

*Luke studies Fizz*

Luke: Does this happen often?

Fizz: I don't usually make deliveries.

Aragorn: There's only one conclusion then.

*Fizz looks distressed*

Fizz: And that is??

Harry: You're as lost as the rest of us.

*Fizz looks a cross between furious and terrified*

*Superdude steps out of the crowd*

Superdude: Have no fear, young food-bearer! For – 

Pippin: Food?

*Fizz gives Pippin the bag*

*Pippin and Merry devour the burger and fries*

Superdude: For I am – 

*Fizz notices him*

Fizz: Oh wow…Superdude! Wow…is it really you, Superdude?

*everyone rolls their eyes*

Aragorn: If he's everything he brags about, then he's DEFINITELY Superdude!

Fizz: Wow…this is amazing! I can't believe it! But…what should we do?

Superdude: Come, we will find our way out of this!

*Superdude leads Fizz down a different path*

Superdude: Thank you, fellow travelers! Good luck on your journey!

Pippin: Bye Superdude! Thanks for the food, new guy!

*Merry nods his agreement*

*Fizz waves good-bye*

Oliver: Well this is just great!

*Harry nods in agreement*

Scott: What's wrong?

Harry: We lost a chaser.

Wedge: A chaser?

Oliver: Superdude was one of my chasers. Where am I going to find a third chaser out here??

Scarecrow: What's a chaser?

Pippin: I'm a chaser!

Harry: We had to build a new Quidditch team. Chasers are the three players in charge of scoring.

Scarecrow: *obviously still confused* I see.

*Oliver starts down the path again, obviously very frustrated*

*others all follow*

*****

*Coach Kreeton finally opens his eyes*

Coach Kreeton: Ahhh!

*all villains standing over him jump back*

Coach Kreeton: Aw…why can't Coach Kreeton wake up from this miserable nightmare, huh?

Iago: This isn't a nightmare, oh smart one!

Coach Kreeton: Ahh! A talking bird! Coach Kreeton thought that only happened on TV!

*villains all look shocked*

Voldemort: There!

Saruman: He spoke of the TV!

Coach Kreeton: *glancing around* Why you all look at Coach Kreeton when he mentions TV?

*various gasps*

Coach Kreeton: Gah! Will someone please explain to Coach Kreeton what's going on?

Iago: *frustrated* Well Coach Kreeton, why don't you look around at all the TV CHARACTERS!

*Coach Kreeton looks around*

Coach Kreeton: AHHH!

*he runs from the castle, still screaming*

Iago: Whoops.

*nasty-looking clawed hand grabs Iago by the throat*

*Uruk-Hai growls menacingly*

Saruman: Now, feathered one, you must explain TV to us. Only then will I allow my Uruk-Hai to release you.

Magneto: Saruman, stop!

Saruman: How dare you command a Wizard!

Dr. Doom: We do not question a Wizard's power, sir. We only wish to explain what is going on.

*Saruman waves a hand*

*Uruk-Hai releases Iago*

Iago: *gasping* Took you long enough!

*all eyes turn to Magneto and Dr. Doom*

Magneto: *sighs* We all know we are not where we should be.

Shredder: Yes, we are all aware of that.

Dr. Doom: We all come from different worlds – 

Rita: Get on with it!

Dr. Doom: Do not interrupt me, _madam_! As I was saying, what some of you do not know is that the world Erik and I are from –

Iago: Erik? Who's Erik?

Magneto: I am Erik.

*Doom glares at Iago*

Dr. Doom: Erik and I come from a world that relies on technology. We have many inventions that help us in everyday life.

Magneto: One such invention we call the television, or TV. It's only a small black box that shows us pictures. I suppose, since you're all here and real, that you could consider TV to be a window into each of your worlds.

Voldemort: Continue.

Dr. Doom: Erik and I have seen each one of you before.

*skeptical looks*

Darth Vader: Can you prove this?

*Magneto and Dr. Doom examine the crowd*

Magneto: *to the Wicked Witch* You.

Wicked Witch: I hardly believe you could know anything about me!

Dr. Doom: Your sister, the Wicked Witch of the East, was killed as a farmhouse fell from the sky and landed on her.

Wicked Witch: *shocked* How do you know this?

Saruman: They speak the truth!

Rita: They know all about all of us!

*villains all start shouting at once*

*Magneto and Dr. Doom fight for attention and lose*

Iago: Good job, oh knowledgable ones.

*Magneto and Dr. Doom glare at him*


	9. Signs Point Ahead

**~AUTHOR'S NOTE~** I just want to apologize in advance to Belle…the character of Belle in this story isn't necessarily the nicest. I'm sorry! I don't mean anything against you, I promise! Playful Heart Monkey makes an appearance in the end, I promise ;)

**~DISCLAIMER~** Don't own anything. Own this REALLY weird story, but that's it…

THE QUAFFLE MYSTERY Chapter 9 

Oliver: DAMMIT!

*others stop, by now used to Oliver's frustration*

Legolas: *with infinite patience* What is it now, Oliver?

Oliver: A log. Across the path. Too big to move.

Aragorn: *attempting patience* We'll just have to climb over it then.

Luke: Oh, don't worry about that.

Belle: Well then how do you propose we get around it?

*Luke has already closed his eyes in concentration*

Wedge: Just wait. Luke will take care of it.

*the group draws back with shocked looks as the log rises off the ground and settles back to the ground slightly off the path*

*Belle's jaw drops as does everyone else's*

Michelangelo: How did you…what…are you a…?

Oliver: *jubilantly* A WIZARD!

*Oliver runs to Luke*

Oliver: You're a wizard! You much be, to have moved that log!

Luke: I suppose you could say that I am a wizard. I am a Jedi.

Harry: A Jedi?

Oliver: Good enough for me! Luke, how would you like to be our new Quidditch chaser?

Harry: *desperately* Please??

*Luke studies both Oliver and Harry intently*

Luke: I sense that this game you call Quidditch will be very important in the future. So yes. I will be your chaser.

*Oliver actually jumps for joy*

Oliver: Come on! Maybe if we find an open field somewhere we can start practice!

*Oliver runs ahead*

*****

*at the back of the group*

Johnny: Ok so, what? Explain this whole thing to me again.

Jason: Ok. I am the leader of a team of superhero martial arts warriors. We were chosen by a powerful entity named Zordon to protect Earth from an evil force that awakened on the moon.

Johnny: I see. So you are a martial artist?

Jason: Yes. I hold the rank of black belt.

Belle: *overhears* Wow!

*Belle bats her eyelashes at Jason*

Johnny: *glaring at Belle* Jason, ignore her. She'll make you think she has feelings for you then you come to find out she has some guy she loves and she's only playing with you.

*Belle sniffs and stalks up to join Dorothy*

Jason: Ok. Avoid the French girl. Can do. So, you said you're a superhero too?

Johnny: Yep. They call me the Human Torch.

Jason: Because…?

Johnny: Oh, my superpower is that I can control fire. And I can set my body on fire.

Jason: Cool. Do you fight alone or…?

Johnny: I'm one of the Fantastic Four. The other three members are the Thing, the Invisible Woman who happens to be my sister, and her husband, Mr. Fantastic, is our leader.

Jason: Awesome. Us Power Rangers protect Angel Grove. What about you?

Johnny: New York City. And the countryside occasionally, but that's mostly left up to the X-Men.

Jason: X-Men?

*Johnny gestures to Scott*

Johnny: Scott's team.

Jason: Oh.

*he notices the group is slowing*

Jason: Hey, what's up?

*at the head of the group Legolas has stopped*

*he stands listening intently*

Merry: Legolas?

Aragorn: What is it, my friend?

*Legolas looks puzzled*

Legolas: Singing. Very strange singing!

Aragorn: Luke!

*Luke makes his way to the head of the group*

Luke: *closing his eyes* There are many of them. And Legolas is correct. The rest of us are unable to hear but they are indeed singing.

Aragorn: Are they dangerous?

*Luke opens his eyes*

Luke: No, I don't sense any danger from them. But we may appear frightful to them. Perhaps we should send a small team up to meet them.

Aragorn: Good idea. Any suggestions for a team?

Legolas: I'll go.

Luke: No. This is a diminutive race. I think the two hobbits should go.

Pippin: *eavesdropping* Us??

Merry: Alone? Cool!

Luke: No, Harry Potter should go with you. And Dumbo as well.

*Harry and Dumbo nod*

Wedge: But what should the rest of us do?

Luke: I think we – 

Legolas: We should hide.

*Luke looks at him strangely*

Luke: Yes. I think we should. But don't be worried everyone! We're hiding so as not to scare them.

*Merry, Pippin, Harry, and Dumbo break off from the group and hesitantly move toward the now audible singing*

*the rest of the group finds various comfortable places to hide off the path*

*****

Iago: Are we _really_ going to just SIT here all day??

*all villains have again reverted back to the evil staring contest*

Emperor: My fellow villains! There is something very important that I have foreseen.

Darth Vader: Master?

*the Emperor holds up a hand for silence*

Saruman: By all means sir, please inform us of your vision.

Emperor: I have foreseen our way home. There is a game. Our enemy collectively seems to know how to play this game.

Iago: So?

Emperor: *glares at Iago* We must learn this. Only by defeating the powers of light here in this world can we strand them here and return to our own.

Dr. Doom: Yes, but what happens if they defeat us?

Emperor: Should that happen, we shall all return to our respective worlds and balance will be restored.

Rita Repulsa: But either way we get home?

Emperor: Yes madam.

Saruman: What must we do to defeat our rivals in this game?

Emperor: My dear Wizard. _We_ shall not play this game, our minions shall!

*Saruman nods understandingly*

Emperor: We must teach our minions to defy gravity and ride long sticks with straw ends. Leather spheres move on their own accord and the game is only won by catching a small golden orb.

*all villains look confused*

Wicked Witch: Defy gravity on sticks with straw ends? You mean fly on broomsticks?

Emperor: If that is what you call it.

*Voldemort looks increasingly horrified*

Voldemort: Tell me, Emperor, did you see anything further of this game?

*the Emperor closes his eyes in concentration*

Emperor: I see robes. The players wear colored robes. And there are three tall hoops at both ends of the field.

*Voldemort's face has become deathly pale*

Voldemort: Oh…

Iago: Uh oh…he's cracked!

Voldemort: Oh no…

Saruman: Lord Voldemort, what's wrong?

*dark memories flicker across Voldemort's face*

Voldemort: *through clenched teeth* Quidditch!


	10. Melodious Visitors

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** Sorry it took me so long to update, as usual! I was going to update this a few days ago, but a certain SOMEONE had my notebook with this story in it *glares pointedly* But it's ok…it's here now =)

**DISCLAIMER** I don't own anyone from this story at all. I just own ideas and stuff like that…but no characters.

**NEW CHARACTERS**

**Satine** The doomed star of the _Moulin Rouge_, Satine made her stage debut in the new musical "Spectacular Spectacular." She and the musical's writer Christian fell deeply in love.

**Christian** Writer of the _Moulin Rouge_'s new musical "Spectacular Spectacular," Christian made the mistake of falling in love with the play's star Satine. The beautiful courtesean was already promised to the Duke, making their love against all rules and odds.

**The Mayor** Ruler of Munchkinland, the Mayor honors Dorothy and sets her on her path to the Wizard after Dorothy drops her house on the Wicked Witch of the East in _The Wizard of Oz_.

**OTHER THINGS TO KEEP IN MIND**

**The Mayor** All the Munchkins sound like they've inhaled helium.

**THE QUAFFLE MYSTERY Chapter 10**

*Harry, Merry, Pippin, and Dumbo wander alone*

Pippin: Uh…does anyone hear the singing that Legolas was talking about?

*Merry shakes his head*

*Dumbo suddenly stops, lifting one large ear*

Dumbo: _There's singing from two directions. One from up ahead and one off to the left_.

Harry: Should we check the closer one then?

*everyone nods*

*they break through the bushes to see a lavish stage full of dancers*

Satine and Christian: *singing* I will love you until my dy-ing…

*they stop and stare at their visitors*

Christian: Who are you? Where'd you all come from?

Merry: Uh…sorry.

Harry: We must have taken a wrong turn!

*they run away back towards the path*

Satine: *faintly* Now, where were we?

Satine and Christian: *singing* I will love you until my dy-ing day!

Pippin: So where are the people Legolas hear singing?

*an army of small voices is heard farther up the path*

Harry: I think they're up there.

*the four head toward the voices and meet a small army of small people*

*all stand wide-eyed for a moment, especially Merry and Pippin*

Pippin: Hobbits!

The Mayor: Munchkins!

Harry: Huh?

*****

*the rest of the travelers are lounging off the path*

Jason: What do you suppose is taking them so long?

Aragorn: *shrugs* Who knows. I'm sure they're all right though.

Oliver: Yeah. Harry is the most renowned wizard in history after all.

Wedge: And Luke would know if something happened to them.

Aragorn: Exactly.

*Legolas suddenly jumps to his feet*

Legolas: Several people are approaching!

*Aragorn draws his sword*

*Wedge readies his blaster*

*Michelangelo is already spinning his nunchucks*

*Oliver pulls out his wand*

*Spike changes to full vampire face*

*Stitch growls*

Johnny: Flame on!

*Jason pulls out a highly technical looking belt buckle*

Jason: Tyrannosaurus!

*in the blink of an eye, Jason is now wearing a white and red spandex jumpsuit and helmet*

Belle: What the hell are you _wearing??_

Jason: This may not look very strong, but it is a supersuit strong enough to repel even laser fire!

Belle: Uh huh.

*Luke and Legolas look amused*

Luke: Uh, guys?

Legolas: They aren't dangerous.

Aragorn: O-oh.

*everyone returns to normal, looking very sheepish*

*Luke half closes his eyes*

Luke: Our companions are returning.

*Harry, Merry, Pippin, and Dumbo appear on the path, followed by a small army*

Pippin: Hey! We're back!

Jason: We see.

Scarecrow: Who are your new friends?

*Toto barks*

*Dorothy picks him up*

Dorothy: We know them! Don't we, Toto?

*Toto barks again*

The Mayor: Dorothy! Did you lose your way? This isn't the yellow brick road.

Dorothy: I know! Toto and I lost the yellow brick road a long time ago.

Aragorn: *to Merry* Are they hobbits?

Merry: They _look like hobbits, but the one talking to Dorothy said they're Munchkins. What's a Munchkin?_

*Aragorn shrugs*

*Dorothy and the Mayor approach Aragorn*

Dorothy: Aragorn? This is the Mayor of Munchkinland. He sent Toto and I on our journey to the Wizard.

Harry: *to Oliver* More Wizards?

*Oliver shrugs*

Dorothy: He says he knows where we can find the Wizard.

Aragorn: I see.

Dorothy: So I think Toto and the Scarecrow and I are going to go with them.

Aragorn: *glancing at the Munchkin army* Ok. If you feel it's best.

Dorothy: Don't worry. I trust the Munchkins.

Wedge: Good luck Dorothy!

*Dorothy, Toto, and the Scarecrow follow the Munchkin army away from the group*

Dorothy and the Scarecrow: *singing* Weeee're off to see the Wizard! The wonderful Wizard of Oz…

Johnny: Well THAT was interesting…


	11. Quidditch Practice for Everyone

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** I'm trying to be better with posting, I swear! It's hard but I'm really trying.

**DISCLAIMER** I don't own anyone in this story. No one!

**NEW CHARACTER**

**Jeff** Jeff Probst is the host of CBS's hit reality show _Survivor_. He runs challenges and tribal councils, checks up on the survivors, and smiles throughout the whole thing.

**THE QUAFFLE MYSTERY Chapter 11**

*the villains have gathered their minions on a Quidditch Pitch conveniently located behind their castle*

*7 broomsticks and the 4 quidditch balls lie on the field*

Voldemort: First I feel that we must assign players. Could all forms of minions please come forward?

*various creatures step forward*

*Voldemort studies the group*

Voldemort: Three flying monkeys will be our chasers.

Wicked Witch: *grinning* They will serve you well!

Voldemort: The Uruk-Hai shall be our Keeper. Two members of the Shredder's Foot Clan shall play Beaters and the bird shall be our Seeker.

Iago: Whoa, what?

Voldemort: You can fly on your own and are small. You are the ideal Seeker, regardless of the fact that you are competing against Harry Potter.

Iago: Harry Potter? But McGonagall said he's the youngest Seeker of the century!

Darth Vader: How do you know this?

Iago: Uh, hello? I have seen the movie!

Shredder: How, sire, do you plan to teach these various creatures to play what appears to be a complicated game? Not to mention teaching them to fly.

*Voldemort smiles*

Voldemort: A simple task.

*he pulls out his wand and mutters an incantation*

*the assigned Quidditch players immediately leap onto their broomsticks and handle the Quidditch balls like professional players*

Shredder: Most impressive!

*the Emperor comes out of the castle*

Emperor: Excellent! Soon we shall defeat our enemies and return to rule our worlds!

*he cackles evilly*

*****

*the path suddenly ends*

Pippin: Hey! The path ended!

*Legolas restrains Aragorn, who looks ready to murder the hobbit*

Merry: *wide-eyed* What's that?

*he points to the ocean, which appeared to one side when the path ended*

Legolas: *in an awed whisper* The sea!

Sebastian: Home!

*everyone jumps, having completely forgotten that he was there*

Oliver: Look!

*he points to a field on the opposite side of the path*

Oliver: Now we can practice!

*everyone groans and rolls their eyes*

*Harry, like a good Seeker, leads the team to the field*

Sebastian: It's been fun, but I gotta get back to the Kingdom. Belle, Dumbo, Stitch, I'll see you at the next reunion!

Belle: Goodbye Sebastian! Say hi to King Triton for me!

*Sebastian nods and leaps into the waves*

Aragorn: King Triton?

Belle: Mm-hmm. Sebastian is an advisor of sorts to Triton, King of the mer-people.

Jason: Mer-people?

Dumbo: _Mermaids._

Legolas: I have heard tell of mermaids! Elvish legends of beautiful maidens with the tails of fish who live underwater between Middle Earth and the Undying Lands.

*Aragorn glances warningly at Legolas*

Aragorn: Your heart wanders, my friend.

Legolas: *firmly* It absolutely does not!

Belle: *curiously* Wanders from what?

Legolas: Nothing.

*the remainder of the group watched the Quidditch team practice*

*Oliver has fashioned 6 broomsticks from tree branches*

Oliver: Ok. First you all need to learn to fly. Step up to your brooms. Dumbo, you can fly on your own, so you don't need a broom.

*Dumbo nods*

*Stitch, Merry, Pippin, and Luke all stand next to broomsticks*

Harry: Now watch me. Up!

*at his word, the makeshift broom leaps into his hand*

Pippin: Wow!

Oliver: You all try it.

*everyone copies Harry*

Luke: *in a soft voice* Up!

*the broom leaps to his hand*

*no one else has success*

Harry: *studying the players* Hmm. Uh, Wood?

Oliver: What Harry?

Harry: I think there might be a problem. Stitch and the two hobbits…I think they're Muggles.

*Oliver thinks for a minute*

Oliver: There is _one_ thing we can do. But we'd have to keep it a secret.

Harry: Of course.

Oliver: Luke and Dumbo! Come over here and stand with Harry and me.

*Luke and Dumbo join Oliver and Harry to face Merry, Pippin, and Stitch*

*Oliver pulls out his wand and softly murmurs an incantation*

*Merry, Pippin, and Stitch immediately leap onto their brooms and fly like they have years of experience*

Merry: Wow!

Harry: Bloody Hell, Wood! What was that?

Oliver: A _very_ illegal talent spell. It can give anyone the skills of a professional Quidditch player. It was outlawed by the Ministry, who was afraid of rigged Quidditch matches.

Harry: So then, how do you know it?

Oliver: Fred and George. They found out about it somehow and taught it to me.

Harry: How did they know?

Oliver: I didn't ask.

Harry: *laughing* Good idea!

Oliver: Come on!

*he takes a broom and flies up to joint the team*

*Luke and Harry follow*

*Dumbo, with a running start, takes off*

Legolas: There is strong magic at work here.

Aragorn: My friend?

Legolas: *softly* But strong dark magic as well.

Aragorn: How do you know this?

*Legolas says nothing, only watches intently*

*****

*the evil Quidditch team has lined up in front of the line of villains*

Voldemort: We are ready!

Emperor: Excellent!

Rita: But what do we do now?

*before anyone can reply, a man in khaki jungle gear comes out of the castle*

Jeff: Congratulations! You've completed the first part of your challenge.

Wicked Witch: Huh?

Magneto: Challenge?

Saruman: What is this devilry you speak of?

Jeff: *grinning* No devilry sir. Please follow me.

Dr. Doom: Who?

Jeff: Everyone!

*they all shrug and follow Jeff off through the woods*

*he leads them to a large genuine Quidditch stadium*

Jeff: Teams will find broomsticks in your designated area off the pitch. All spectators please will remain in the stands. I will be back.

*he turns to leave*

Emperor: You will not go anywhere!

Jeff: I have to go get the other team. Look, I know that this world is your creation, Palpitine.

*all other villains glare at him shocked and angry*

Jeff: But you have no power over me! I'm stuck here just to explain everything. And I'll be back.


	12. This is It

**DISCLAIMER** I don't own anyone here. See all disclaimers before this.

Spike: *yelling* Oliver! Come down here!

*Legolas puts a hand on Spike's shoulder*

Legolas: Shh!

Spike: What's wrong mate?

Legolas: Let them practice.

Spike: But what's the point of practicing?

Legolas: This game is very important. If our team does not play well, we may never leave this world!

Michelangelo: Dude, I know you're not, like, human, but there is something weird about you!

Legolas: About me? I should hope I am different than human. Elves are –

Aragorn: *rolling his eyes* Sweet Valar, here we go!

Legolas: *laughing* Well, Elves are just higher beings, that's all.

Michelangelo: Oh.

*up above*

Luke: Oliver! I think we should rest awhile!

Oliver: Rest?? During Quidditch practice?

Harry: I think he's right Wood. Look.

*Merry and Pippin, regardless of the spell, are exhausted on their branches*

Oliver: *obviously disappointed* All right. Harry, let them know.

*Harry flies to tell the other players and they all land*

Pippin: Phew! Who knew Quidditch this hard?

*Harry and Oliver just look at each other*

*Legolas has been watching the bushes tensely and pulls an arrow from his quiver*

Legolas: Aragorn, nad no ennas!

*Aragorn quickly pulls his sword*

Michelangelo: Huh? Dude, what did he say?

Johnny: I have no idea! It was some other language.

Luke: He said something's out there.

Spike: How do you know mate? What language was he speaking anyway? I was around Europe for 100 years and it's close to a few languages I've heard but not close enough.

Luke: I don't know what language he spoke.

Scott: But then how do you know what he said?

*Luke isn't paying any more attention and has joined Aragorn and Legolas*

Wedge: Must be a Jedi thing.

*Jeff pops out of the bushes*

*Legolas almost fires the arrow but Aragorn puts a hand on his shoulder*

Aragorn: Tengado, mellon nîn. He is unarmed.

Legolas: *lowering his bow* Yes. I sense that now.

Luke: You sense that? Legolas, you and I must talk later on.

*Legolas nods*

*Jeff approaches*

Jeff: Congratulations, all of you! You have completed your journey. Now you await your last challenge.

*confused looks*

Jason: What are you talking about?

Legolas: *to Jason* He's talking about –

Luke: Quidditch.

Oliver: *perking up* Quidditch? Where?

Jeff: *to Luke and Legolas* How did you know?

Everyone: Don't ask!

*Jeff just shrugs and beckons to everyone*

Jeff: Follow me!

*Luke, Legolas, and Oliver immediately follow with everyone else following skeptically*

*****

*they arrive on en empty Quidditch pitch out of sight of all bad guys*

Oliver: *jubilantly clutching Harry's arm* Harry! Harry, do you see this??

Harry: I see it, Wood, I see it!

Jeff: Now. The Quidditch team will find your broomsticks in your designated area. And I must ask the spectators to stay in _your designated areas. You might see some people who will surprise you._

*confused looks*

*the spectators file off into the stands*

Oliver: Come on team!

*the team follows him into the locker room*

*White Quidditch robes, made specifically for each player are hanging up*

Stitch: Eeehaha!

*he grabs a set of robes with six legs and pops out his two extra limbs*

Pippin: Look Merry! Hobbit sized robes!

Oliver: All right everyone! Let's suit up and win this game!

*****

Voldemort: We demand an explanation!

*Darth Vader is standing protectively in front of Emperor Palpitine*

Wicked Witch: The jungle man said you created this world!

Saruman: He works against us!

Emperor: You will allow me to explain!

*the villains fall strangely silent*

Emperor: This world that we all find ourselves trapped in is the byproduct of an assassination attempt.

Magneto: Assassination attempted? Against who?

Rita: Yeah, who'd you try to bump off?

Vader: My son.

Emperor: *before anyone can ask more questions* The power of the Dark Side has gifted me with foresight. Lord Vader's son is a very strong enemy and does not share his father's…ambition.

Voldemort: Sons often rebel against their fathers. My father was a filthy Muggle.

Vader: Luke does not see the power of the Dark Side. That is all.

Voldemort: Aha! There is no good and evil. Only power and –

Emperor: SILENCE.

*there is silence*

Emperor: I have foreseen that the boy will be my downfall. Therefore, I sent him here. However, I also somehow sent myself and Lord Vader here as well. It must have broken more barriers than I imagined, since you are all here as well.

*Rita, holding a telescope, suddenly screams*

Doom: I pray you, Madam, do not shriek like that again.

Rita: *pointing* Look!

*the villains se the heroes in the stands across the pitch*

Rita: That brat Red Ranger!

Magneto: Cyclops!

Doom: Johnny Storm.

Saruman: Aragorn and the Elf.

Shredder: A turtle!

*across the pitch*

Legolas: Aragorn. Look.

Aragorn: *squinting* Legolas, my eyes must be mistaken!

Michelangelo: It's him. The Shredder!

Wedge: Our enemies are against us!

Legolas: Remain calm. They cannot hurt us there. That is not the purpose of being here.

Wedge: You speak like a Jedi, Elf.

Aragorn: He is right, my friend. You are acting strangely.

Legolas: *firmly* We must not engage them!

Aragorn: *quietly* May the grace of the Valar protect us.

**Nad no ennas **Something's out there

**Tengado, mellon nîn** Hold, my friend

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** The next chapter will the Quidditch match and then it's over! There will be a real ending and then a fun little alternate ending that I wrote also.


	13. That's All Folks

**AUTHOR'S NOTE** Aww, this is the end! *sniff* Quick thing – I don't know if Voldemort/Tom Riddle ever played Quidditch, but I've decided that he did, lol, just so there's no confusion.

**DISCLAIMER** Don't own them! I _wish I owned some of them, but you'll see what I mean…_

*the team waits behind a large door in white robes with broomsticks*

Harry: Ow!

Oliver: What is it Harry?

*Harry looks scared*

Harry: My scar is burning.

Oliver: *gravely* We must be on our guard.

Luke: What does it mean if your scar burns?

Harry: Voldemort is near.

*****

Rita: This is ridiculous!

*she is apparently getting on everyone's nerves*

Voldemort: Madam, I already explained that they cannot hurt us, so therefore we cannot either engage them.

Rita: But they're so helpless!

Shredder: She speaks the truth. That turtle is unarmed. It would be so easy…

Saruman: ENOUGH! The game begins.

*all 14 players fly out onto the field, half in white robes, half in black*

Jeff: You should all know that cheating is impossible and that the fate of all of your worlds rests with this game. Good luck!

*the balls are released and play begins*

*****

*minutes have passed with no score*

Wedge: *worriedly* What will happen if we lose the game?

Legolas: *calmly* We're stuck here.

Johnny: What??

Spike: For how long?

Legolas: Forever.

*he turns to face the other good guys*

Legolas: If we don't win this game, we're never going home.

*****

*a Foot Clan ninja bats a bludger towards Stitch, who bats it in another direction with one arm and makes obscene gestures with two others*

*Merry takes the Quaffle and tosses it right past the Uruk-Hai*

Pippin: For the Shire, Merry!

Merry: For the Shire!

*Harry suddenly sees the Snitch and dives for it*

Iago: *giving up* I'm not up for this! Let him win!

*Harry pulls out of the dive with the Snitch in his hand*

*****

Aragorn: Hey. We won!

Jason: We did?

Spike: Harry caught the little gold thing. I think that means we won.

Johnny: That was kind of anti-climactic.

*all good Quidditch players have gathered around Harry on the ground*

Belle: Come on, let's go down there!

*****

*the evil players, meanwhile, have returned to the stands*

Voldemort: Insolent useless pest!

Iago: Hey, I'd like to see you play Quidditch!

Voldemort: I did!

Iago: Oh.

Emperor: You will pay for this, feathered one!

*Iago's eyes open wide and he flies up and away*

Iago: Hey! The barrier's gone!

Saruman: What?

Iago: The barrier that was here before. It's gone! I'm outta here!

*he flies off into the horizon*

Jeff: *out of nowhere* Yes, the barrier is gone. Not only can you leave, but you must leave now or you will be trapped here forever.

Voldemort: At last!

*he apparates and disappears*

*Rita jabs the ground with her outlandish-looking staff and disappears in a crack of thunder*

*the Wicked Witch takes off on her broomstick, cackling the whole way*

Saruman: Come! We must return to our army waiting for us in the caverns of Isengard! Rohan is ready to fall.

*he walks off, dignified, with the Orc and Uruk-Hai following*

*Magneto levitates himself and Dr. Doom up and away*

Shredder: Come, Foot Clan! I must destroy those turtles!

*they leave, leaving Darth Vader and the Emperor alone with Jeff*

Jeff: *grinning* Sorry you plan didn't work as well as you'd hoped, Palpitine. But good luck next time!

*he leaves*

*the Emperor glares after him and in a flash of blue lightning, he and Vader are gone*

*****

*Jeff walks onto the Quidditch Pitch*

Jeff: Congratulations.

Oliver: Did you see that?! It was like their Seeker just quit! Smart move too, Harry's the best Seeker we've ever had…

*everyone crowds Harry*

Jeff: I'm sorry to interrupt your celebration, but something is about to happen.

*everyone stops*

Belle: What do you mean?

Scott: What's going to happen?

Jeff: Since you won the Ultimate Game, you have won the right to all go home. But you must say good-bye and leave now.

Spike: I'm bloody out of here then!

*he speaks from under his jacket and runs for shelter from the sun*

Michelangelo: I'm with that dude. I could use some pizza!

*he leaves singing "Tequila"*

Jason: No offense everyone, but I do have a Superhero team to look after.

*he starts off through the trees*

Belle: Yeah…I should get back to the Beast…

*she runs after Jason*

*Johnny rolls his eyes*

Scott: Johnny, we should get back to New York. Can you fly us there?

Johnny: Yeah, let's go. Flame on!

*the Human Torch lifts Scott up and they fly off*

Dumbo: _I miss my mother. Bye everyone!_

*he also flies off*

*the Quidditch team stands together*

Oliver: *sadly* You all played very well. I'll miss you all! *to Harry* Come on, Harry. Let's apparate home.

Harry: But Oliver, I'm only a second year! I don't know how to apparate! And you're not supposed to either.

*Oliver tries to look innocent*

Oliver: Just close your eyes and concentrate.

*Oliver and Harry disappear*

*Stitch pulls out a rocket pack and shoots off laughing*

Luke: Legolas, my friend. You are a Force user.

Legolas: *smiling* Yes, I know. All Elf-kind are. It is part of our power.

Luke: It will return you to your Middle Earth.

Legolas: Thank you Jedi Knight Luke Skywalker. May the grace of the Valar protect you.

Luke: And may the Force be with you, Legolas Greenleaf, Prince of the Woodland Realm.

*Luke and Wedge disappear*

Pippin: Wow!

Aragorn: Come on, Legolas. Let us return home.

*Legolas nods*

*The Elf, man, and two hobbits disappear*

Jeff: And so ends the Quaffle Mystery.

*black*

**Hehe**, tricked you! This is the end, but I also wrote an alternate ending. So there will be one more chapter. And you'll also find out what I meant in the disclaimer on this chapter in the alternate ending.


	14. Alternate Ending

**AUTHOR'S NOTE 1** Okay, so this is a stupid, pointless, but completely fun alternate ending that I wrote. Basically it's me indulging the (sometimes) horror that is self-insertion. Self-insertion isn't **always** bad, don't get me wrong. *grin* Just read it and enjoy!

Please ignore the Care Bears thing…it's a very long story.

**DISCLAIMER** I don't own anyone! Well, I own myself and my friends (yes, every Care Bear alter ego is a real person) own themselves, but that's it.

*Jeff walks onto the Quidditch Pitch*

Jeff: Congratulations.

Oliver: Did you see that?! It was like their Seeker just quit! Smart move too, Harry's the best Seeker we've ever had…

*everyone crowds Harry*

Jeff: I'm sorry to interrupt your celebration, but something is about to happen.

*everyone freezes as a man, five multi-colored bears, a blue dog, a blue bunny, and a brown monkey enter the pitch*

*all animals have symbols on their stomachs*

*a turquoise bear claps her hands and they all become human*

The Author/Wish Bear: All right Jeff, we can take it from here!

Jeff: Uh…ok…

Katius/Share Bear: Ooh! Look at the cute elephant!

Emica/Playful Heart Monkey: Uh, Katius? Who's the guy?

*she points to the lost-looking man in a loincloth*

Belle: Dumbo, isn't that Tarzan?

*Dumbo nods*

Katius/Share Bear: I dunno. I just found him wandering along the path. Can I keep him?

The Author/Wish Bear: Sure.

Jason: Whoa, whoa, what's going on?

The Author/Wish Bear: That's simple – I'm the Author and we've come to take you all home with us. That is, if you want to go.

Johnny: *shrugs* Cool.

Rachel/Swift Heart Rabbit: I want the hot one in the red shirt!

*she and Jason happily leave the pitch*

Belle: Uh, since there are no guys in your group, can I just go back to the Beast now?

The Author/Wish Bear: Yeah, go.

*Belle leaves*

Oliver: Uh, can Harry and I leave too? The Quidditch team needs us.

The Author/Wish Bear: *disappointed* Yeah…

*Meg must restrain Emica and Katius must restrain the Author from jumping Oliver as he and Harry leave*

Katius/Share Bear: Can I keep the elephant? Puh-leeeease?

The Author/Wish Bear: Yeah, but I get Stitch!

*Katius shrugs and leaves with Dumbo and Tarzan in tow*

Emily/Love-a-Lot Bear: I want a cute little hobbit thing!

The Author/Wish Bear: Ok, you can have Merry. I want Pippin!

Michelangelo: Dudes, no one's gunna want a turtle and to be honest, the only human I like is April. Can I go?

*the Author nods*

Emica/Playful Heart Monkey: Hmm. I guess I'll take Scott, but only if he agrees to wear black leather like in the movie!

Scott: Uh…sure…

Meg/Loyal Heart Dog: Can I have Aragorn? Ooh, and Wedge. I want Wedge too!

The Author/Wish Bear: Sure, cuz I'm taking Luke.

Luke: Your planet is very interesting.

Emily/Love-a-Lot Bear: How come you get three people?

Kate/Funshine Bear: Yeah, I want someone!

Legolas: Before anyone claims me, I should mention that I have a girl waiting for me in Lothlórien…

The Author/Wish Bear: Yeah, I know. You can go back to her.

*Legolas leaves*

The Author/Wish Bear: And I get three cuz I'm the author! Kate, you can have the Human Torch.

Kate/Funshine Bear: Ooh, I like the sound of that!

Margaret/Bedtime Bear: I want someone too!

Spike: How 'bout me, love?

*he leads Margaret off*

*the Author looks around*

The Author/Wish Bear: Well, looks like everyone's happy!

*she takes out a pen*

The Author/Wish Bear: I hereby declare this THE END.

**AUTHOR'S NOTE 2** No one got Oliver because Emica and I were fighting over him *wink* And there is also a TOTALLY shameless plug for my Lord of the Rings fics "Immortal Night" and its sequel "Beyond Morning"…that's what Legolas is referring to when he says he has a girl in Lothlórien waiting for him.

Thanks everyone for reading THE QUAFFLE MYSTERY!


End file.
